?

As I open a new page..
I see one clear sheet
And I already had a pen on my hands
Feel like I should be ready again
Though I feel so tired and sick
Feel like I'm running out of energy
I should  still fight back
Between tears and faith
Stay or not stay
Brave or scare
Care or not care
Which one I choose?
I might not be confused
This is really one clear sheet
What should I write first?
?